Cue Barry Manilow! "Looks Like We Made it" … Good night (morning) pic.twitter.com/C84ch7NSKN
— Paul Allen (@PAOnTheMic) August 19, 2016
Minnesota Vikings announcer Paul Allen travels on the same flight as the Vikings, and their flight back from Seattle overnight might have made you vomit thanks to horrible turbulence.
Allen tweeted 28 times (a few more if you count some interaction with fans) describing how bad it was. Based on the meteorologists corresponding with him on Twitter, the bumpy ride was thanks to storms all the way from Montana to Minnesota.
Make sure you read all the way through, it gets pretty funny when he starts describing the flight as the urinal cake of aviation.
This turbulence over Montana is real-deal Holyfield. Hating it. Moderate chop this ass.
— Paul Allen (@PAOnTheMic) August 19, 2016
I mean, @apneums @athielen19 @nacholeber @PeteBercich @gregcoleman8 @wobby can somebody lend a hand? Moderate chop this ass.
— Paul Allen (@PAOnTheMic) August 19, 2016
I mean, @EricSugarATC i might need some Certified Athletic Trainer-like comforting back here. Moderate chop this ass.
— Paul Allen (@PAOnTheMic) August 19, 2016
YES!!! FLIGHT ATTENDANTS UP AND WALKING!!! Maybe it's over. Moderate chop this ass.
— Paul Allen (@PAOnTheMic) August 19, 2016
Crap! FAs sitting down again. When FAs buckle in the struggle is real. This sucks. Can't we make a left or something? Moderate chop this ass
— Paul Allen (@PAOnTheMic) August 19, 2016
Today? With this bleeping turbulence I'm concerned about next week. The struggle is real. https://t.co/xylJjaNYY7
— Paul Allen (@PAOnTheMic) August 19, 2016
OMG. Hold my hand, Chris. https://t.co/d75VWvlrzJ
— Paul Allen (@PAOnTheMic) August 19, 2016
OMG! I'm on Linval's side of the plane and it's leaning. This totally bites. My struggle is so real right now it hurts. FAs buckled in again
— Paul Allen (@PAOnTheMic) August 19, 2016
Huh? All of it. Meanwhile, this flight home more bumpy than Browns QB situation last 20 yrs. Moderate chop this ass https://t.co/MIr1dIvFQq
— Paul Allen (@PAOnTheMic) August 19, 2016
Meanwhile, stud anchor @paulmagers chilling in SoCal laughing at Cornfields-related weather woes. Funny stuff, huh?
— Paul Allen (@PAOnTheMic) August 19, 2016
I could really use a nookie at this moment. And my bed. And calm air. This is harshing mellow of Sherels pick 6 & all its glory.
— Paul Allen (@PAOnTheMic) August 19, 2016
Main man @kbarlowkstp u up? Any word on when this awful storm we r flying over in NoDak comes to an end? I'll say your name on the radio.
— Paul Allen (@PAOnTheMic) August 19, 2016
This bumpy ride/storm over NoDak making me hate the state and I'm not even a big @GopherHockey fan.
— Paul Allen (@PAOnTheMic) August 19, 2016
Hello @Delta any chance u can call pilot of Vikings charter and have him make a right turn or something. Skies acting like we lost!
— Paul Allen (@PAOnTheMic) August 19, 2016
Probably in fetal position like rest of us on this bumpy-ass flight. Seriously, we've been in turbulence for 45 min https://t.co/oKEyARaNlJ
— Paul Allen (@PAOnTheMic) August 19, 2016
FAs up serving cookies. Maybe it's over. Or maybe it's just a tease. Moderate chop this ass.
— Paul Allen (@PAOnTheMic) August 19, 2016
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. stop rooting against me/us. https://t.co/FhcXa7rUmX
— Paul Allen (@PAOnTheMic) August 19, 2016
My head shaking like Paul Allen talking bobblehead ("APISLOOOOSE") we r giving away Sunday @CanterburyPark. Moderate chop this ass.
— Paul Allen (@PAOnTheMic) August 19, 2016
Tweet merited follow. Getting through this turbulence like penetrating staunch Seattle defense. Oh wait …. https://t.co/PF0JVzMUzI
— Paul Allen (@PAOnTheMic) August 19, 2016
TWITTER IS KING. I obsessively tweeted my way through about an hour of awful turbulence to curb anxiety. Still bumpy but twitter rules!
— Paul Allen (@PAOnTheMic) August 19, 2016
Yep, third-to-last row. If @EricSugarATC or Uncle Norv were nice they'd switch because I'm struggling back here. https://t.co/qmpoB8msUc
— Paul Allen (@PAOnTheMic) August 19, 2016
Just said to FA "what, was the eye of a bleeping tornado not available? Seriously." She didn't think it was funny.
— Paul Allen (@PAOnTheMic) August 19, 2016
This flight home from Seattle is the urine cake of aviation. Moderate chop this ass!
— Paul Allen (@PAOnTheMic) August 19, 2016
NOW IT'S SUPER BUMPY OVER MINNESOTA. Every state is sucking. This flight making Wisconsin seem desirable. FAs scurrying to jump seats. HELP!
— Paul Allen (@PAOnTheMic) August 19, 2016
My God. That looks awful. I hate my life right now. Somebody read me a story. Moderate chop this ass. https://t.co/T1gOXMSy7P
— Paul Allen (@PAOnTheMic) August 19, 2016
The next 16 minutes will whiten all my hair. I mean, Michael McDonald-like sh*t. Moderate chop this ass.
— Paul Allen (@PAOnTheMic) August 19, 2016
I'm glad He does because my current flying struggle is very real. Moderate chop this ass. https://t.co/tu5qrUyHtx
— Paul Allen (@PAOnTheMic) August 19, 2016
